things are...stable. of course i write this the evening of a concert where i could possibly see the ex. i've got my fingers crossed that she is out of town. but you never know. you know?

i seem to be less angry lately. i think a lot of that had to do with me leaving town for a weekend. distance plus a boost in confidence is a good thing. of course things keep knockin' me down, but i'm trying to get back up:

1. i went to s singles event. a gay nerdy singles event. i didn't meet anyone. not my fault, small lesbian showing.

2. soccer started up. new faces. girls and boys. that means wingmen and possible new friends. but having rosacea doesn't help pick up ladies- running around means a red face for a good hour. that plus asthma is oh so attractive! don't forget the constant sneezing from allergies. hot!

3. i went to a party with straightroomie. i was hit on by a boy. some peoples ended up at the late night local gay bar, and the straight(ish- i think she's secretly gay or bi) girl who came with was hounded, i mean fuckin' hounded by the lesbos. it was so strange. at least that boy hit on me. now if only i can fix that gender thing...

4. oh, i don't know what else. i still seem to be less social around the old circle of friends. i went to a bbq yesterday and i think i spoke about 5 words the entire time. doesn't really help that one couple is trying for kids. soon. as in tomorrow, or sometime this week or something. insemination. in-sem-i-nation!

so i'm off now. go buy a canvas, as i have to create something by december 14th. and then, concert tonight! (that's the phrase of the day).